Sometimes reality does hit you hard, but sometimes it can be a lot kinder than it has been and this has been the case in me getting offline and finding balance. I as well decided to look for some traditional work as well and I found that with a well-put-together resume and a curtsy phone call explaining my situation. I am finding that it is helping so much and having a simple goal is helping as well.
I now see what Dr Jorden Peterson is saying when he is saying about cleaning your room and aim at something, for me its was getting well and now being able to work, a casual job. I have to at least try to go back to work, and it’s also about getting out of the house being social and being able to not be on so strict of a budget that we forget to enjoy the little moments.
I have also realized that I am not as isolated as I think I am and that I am blessed to have what I have and to have the options I do have through the NIDS I see that for many people isolation isn’t an option they chose it’s something that just happens to them. I now want to give people my tips for being social and they won’t suit everyone but humans at our core are social creatures and we need social interaction. I saw a really interesting clip on that traditionally if your weren’t married by the time you were the 30s and you were present you became a member of a religious order as this still gave a sense of structure and community. ( and I can’t seem to find the clip but it’s from the Joe Rogan podcast)
Now it’s you do you and you can do life however you want and we have seen an explosion of mental health issues due to people being isolated. I also know that there was a famous addiction study done with Rats and it changed the way we saw addiction as well that the rats were not isolated they were given everything they needed and only the outcasts ever touched the drugged water, and they then realized that addiction was a disease of society and that connection was the way through it. [i]
However, we do see with TV shows such as euphoria, and the real housewives that do glamorize drug and alcohol we need to be very real about it’s effects on the body and mind, and that as I have been struggling with that TV and the internet can be just as addictive, and are more socially persuasive in the dangers that they pose in creating echo chambers as you can choose and you don’t even need to wait for the next week to find out what happened in a series as well.
We also see that there was very different socital expectations on women and men and that a woman needed to have a male, escort her or to protect her and we see if they where unwilling to join a religious community then devoting their time to something like Girl Guides or The CWA ( country womens association) we see that this is still a life of service and gave connection to others.
Yet we are now starting to see the down side of feminism and don’t get me wrong I am all for having equal access to health care and decision making but I see that we have lost something in the traditional structure of society in that men protect women and women make a home or a community. It’s a complex argument that we are seeing harm a lot of young men being told that they are to blame for everything that is wrong with society but it’s not always them at all, some times it’s women that are the problem or the fac that a person is chronicly online so in going back to my introduction we see that people need tips on how to be social.
My first one is very basic but I feel it gets forgotten a lot is take care of your basic personal hygiene and hygiene in the home, as well as this is something that I feel gets forgotten a lot.
Join a club or society if you don’t drink so if you want to meet people outside the drinking seen then consider the clubs and society’s as well.
Consider joining a sports team and if your not into sports maybe becoming a supporter of the team, and volunteering to be able to get out of the house, and this seems basic but getting out of the house is a good one as well and this could be with support workers or it could be with family or by your self what ever works for you will work, and we see that along with this is putting your phone down and giving people your full attention.
As well as bringing back family games nights or even just a community games night, it could be board games, computer games, that are multiplayer games, or even just having dinner at the table and I have started inviting friends over for lunches and it doesn’t have to be fancy it could be as simple as ham and tomato sandwiches and I am finding that by being interested in others lives they are interested in mine as well and I am finding that I am stronger than I know and that this is OK and that we are able to work as a much more effective team.
I am also going to highly suggest to not have your phone in your room and to stick to it and to read a book I am currently reading about the USA, Australian alliance. That goes back to pine gap and how we were forced to accept it in our own yards and that there is good reason to suggest that this was part of the mulit layered reasons that, Gough Whitlam was sacked by the governor general.
I am also simply accepting that I am who I am and that it’s OK to be who I am and to need more down time than others and to realize that I am blessed to live around others and that to have that incidental social connection.
Its something that we all need to be very aware of that we don’t intentionally isolate ourselves but we do get isolated, and to be able to do something about it is something that we need to work on.
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